BAD IDEA GOOD IDEA BAD IDEA GOOD IDEA

MARC JACOBS 4 PERRY ELLIS .93

HUGH GINSPERATION

CLEANIN OUT MY CLOSET (OR SOMETHING)

Sure we're having an 'indian summer' this week or whatever but we all know in like 3 days it's going to be arctic and we're going to have to dig out our moth-eaten sheepskin coats and scarves and pretend like we're still into them even though we never liked them in the first place. Did I make that sound fun? At all? Good. Now, cast your minds back to February and try to remember one trend from Fall 2011. One. Polka Dots? Animal print? Umm.. Remembering trends is so boring and really useless. Unless you work for ASOS I think it's pretty fair to say that 'trends' have absolutely no impact on our lives. What we can do instead is just admit that in winter we like to wear dark colours and furry stuff and sometimes even lipstick. With this in mind I have pulled three items from my closet which I will be wearing to death this winter. xx

1. Pencil Skirt, Topshop. So yeah I mean this is new season and it is polka dot which kind of goes against everything I just said, but the shape, colour and fabric are really seriously good for the price (I think it was £38). I never wear tight stuff ever and the idea of a pencil skirt normally fills me with a disgust and fear reserved only for women who wear 1920's style hats and vintage tea dresses. Amazingly though, despite being unimaginably tight, this skirt doesn't feel costumey or even particularly smart. Wear it with boots and a little wooly jumper for Ghost World meets Hitchcock. If you don't already have a boyfriend, you will now.

2. Dr Martens. Yeah maybe it's boring and Dr Martens are so uncool they became cool again but now they're not even cool from being uncool and so they're uncool WHERE AM I. As long as you aren't rocking a pair of box fresh DM's laced up halfway and open around your leg, then you're good. Regardless of their reputation, there has never been another winter shoe which has warmed, lengthened and slimmed my legs while being ultimate casual wear and getting nicer the more you wear them. Seriously find fault with that.

3. Cashmere coat, TSE. So I bought this last year in a sample sale despite my mum telling me it looked like a dressing gown, and it's ended up being an unbelievable staple in the transition months. Short skirt/long jacket is pretty much unbeatable when it comes to Fall/Spring combos, and I find that short skirt/long jacket/bare legs/black boots, works even better. Think Lara Croft but with softer hair and a touch more modesty. Or Harriet The Spy, or The Little Princess (kind of). It's a winner.

SO SORRY

SONY ERICSSON think that you and I might be interested in "a series of sexy, sinful photos of Daisy Lowe portraying the ‘Seven Deadly Style Sins’ taken by renowned photographer Simon Emmett". Are you interested? Are these sexy? Are they sinful? Do you care? Would you wear a red strapless ballgown? WHO IS SIMON EMMETT (I googled him and somehow found myself here) ??? Is Love Actually actually porn for women? Do you have a blunt fringe? Do you think they'll give me one of these phones?

Way Down.

Today I wore a Meadham Kirchhoff for Topshop dress, over an American Apparel slip thing which I VERY PROFESSIONALLY sewed a secondhand collar onto, a Whistles jumper, See By Chloe boots and an Urban Outfitters beanie (so trendy!). Today my ipod got stolen, I missed my Amazon delivery because I was in the bath, I ate my body weight in Dairy Milk and seasalt and I got caught in a torrential rainstorm without an umbrella. Today sucked. Fully. This outfit is good for a day when you feel so fat and bloated that even the thought of leggings makes you retch. I also went into school wearing glorified pyjamas. Can you guys give me any back to school ideas? I think a B-T-S blog is probably necessary! Pens at the ready xx

ANAIS in MEADHAM

Have you ever seen anything more perfect?

MONDAY BLUES

VIV FOR QUEEN

Handmade in Kenya, these Vivienne Westwood tote bags are woven from recycled fabric and plastic by under privileged women as part of the Trade Center's Ethical Fashion Program of the United Nations. Sure it all sounds a bit Ab Fab when you say it on a blog (ugh) but you can't really argue with charidee sweedie. At £205 you certainly can't buy one for all your friends in a whirlwind of good will, but you can certainly treat yourself to a new school bag without feeling like too much of a brat. Also, ethics aside, that multicoloured one is making some serious eyes at me..

GO STAND ON A RAILROAD TRACK AND TAKE A MOMENT.

NAIL IT: @CHAR_ROBERTS CHANEL GARDEN PARDEE. Boy life is sweet when you're living with a WAH babe.

HI

OMG I LOVE PHOTOBOOTH. Whatever. I got these for a pound today. From the pound shop. Who'd have thunk it!!!!!!!!! xxxx

PASH 4 FASH

Look at all this amazing swag!!!! A huge huge HUGE thankyou to my dream date Francesca who dressed me pretty much head to toe last night. I love you <3. I don't know how I managed to fit dinner into that skirt but I got a risotto and a sticky toffee pudding in there! PROUD. Shirt from Acne, secondhand black strap top, Topshop skirt, DM's and a BEAUTIFUL Mulberry Polly bag. I think this is my favourite outfit ever xx

(IN)DECOROUS TASTY

I'm completely obsessed with this girl's blog. She makes ridiculous crystal shoe harnesses and sequin trainers with bits of fur on the tongue and she recycles old clothing to make NEW COOL STUFF. And you can BUY IT. All I want in the world is Harness no.3, are you listening God? Hello? Okay maybe not all I want in the world, we all saw the new Proenza, but it has certainly got my DIY senses starting to tingle! Watch this space x

YESTERDAY

I wore all this cool stuff which cost like less than £10 altogether. Swishhh.

PLEASE

(sorry)

ASHISH SPRING 2012

SLACKER

Sorry I've been boring this week, I'm working in a GaLLERY. How exciting. I get to have as many coffee breaks as I like. It's so wild. Totally matched my top to the flower arrangement on purpose. And the table.

WELL THAT WAS EASY

Last night Vice threw a party to celebrate the launch of the Xperia unseen series with Sony Ericsson. Me and Polly were pretty sidetracked by the unbelievably delicious canapes and the fact that we knew NOBODY to really explore whether Xperia is like the second installment of Avatar or whatever. We did however manage to corner some guy with what turns out to be an Xperia phone who took a picture of us in ULTRA HIGH QUALITY before Mr Hudson elbowed us out of the way. What a dweeb. I forgot his email address (not Mr Hudsons) so I can't show you the picture but believe me when I say we looked BANGIN. Straight from work BANGIN. They had beer battered chips and honey wieners and goats cheese bruschetta and mojitos. You know what Britney says when her drink runs out? Gimme Gimme Mo'JITOS. Whatever. Anyway because I don't have the Xperia picture of me and Polly you can make do of this one of Daisy Lowe having the best dinner party you were never invited to. And check Sash looking beaut on the left. Can you have more of these parties please Vice? And can I have more of those canapes? Thanks babes luv ya xx PS if you want to see Daisy brushing her teeth and walking her dog to music which sounds suspiciously like The Littl'Ans (oh right Ronnkie was there last night, it all makes sense) then click here.

*Artists impression of the Xperia

IT'S IN THE WATER

VICE BATTERED CHIPS : BIPS

Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless device

IF YOU LOVE ME LIKE JOHNNY LOVES WINONA

TWEET ME AND FOLLOW ME AND ADD ME ON BLOGLOVIN XXX

FASHWEAK

In my opinion there are three types of women at fashion week. The first and least interesting are the professionals who swan around reminding everyone that 'FASHION IS A JOB, THIS IS MY JOB, THIS IS SUCH A CHORE FOR ME, THIS PARTY IS SO BORING, THAT PARTY WILL BE SO BORING BUT I REALLY HAVE TO SHOW MY FACE. WHAT A DRAG.' They like wearing insanely expensive flat shoes and stuff from Dover Street Market which is really ugly but costs so much it ceases to matter what it actually looks like. They love Collette. 

The second and equally yawnsville are the 'kute' fashion girls who wear kute stuff like peter pan collar dresses and red Jeffrey Campbell Lita's. They like round sunglasses, lots of camel, maybe some sort of horrible clog hybrid and absolutely anything from Miu Miu or Mulberry. All PR girls fall into this category even if they're trying to be scary and intimidating by wearing loads of Acne and red lipstick and a dip dye. The only thing scary about them is how much cocaine they huff into the hollow husks of their skulls. Not that I don't like PR girls or anything. Obviously. NB- If a PR girl is ever mean to you or says your name isn't on the guestlist when it like totally is because you asked like 3 weeks ago I would suggest you jab her in the nostrils, she'll be unable to work for WEEKS.

Third and most terrifying are the FASHUN GURLZ. These girls will most likely be wearing a drunk face and an air of aggression. Expect dark lipstick and a sort of Lolita does Beverly Hills style thinspiration (tight dress, clumpy wedges, some kind of daisy chain). They are never lone rangers and always move in packs containing at least one notable fashion celeb, think Pixie Geldof or that hot guy from Salem. If you ever have a chance to hear these FASHUN GURLZ speak you will be surprised by their incredibly posh accents however don't let the simpering and lisping fool you, they'll delete you on facebook and disappear from your life quicker than you can say 'Australian fashion week'. Join their world by wearing Charles Anastase, McQueen and Bess. Don't stay too long.

Unless you feel you are any of the above I would strongly recommend enjoying London Fashion Week from the safety of your home. Make a big jug of Watermelon Martini and get on Style.com. This way you're far less likely to end up in a warehouse in Hackney at 8am with Henry Holland's number in your phone and a bag of complimentary Fashion Week oyster card holders. Cos that sounds fully wack. I think.

I JUST GOT MY SHOES FROM EBAY

AND THEY DON'T FIT. THAT IS NOT A SIZE 5 LADY. GRRRRRRRRRR

Jil Sander Navy SS12

is perfect.

 

LITRITCHA

Last week Vice kindly sent me a copy of their new DOs and DON'Ts book so I could frantically flip through it looking for myself and then read through it more slowly hoping to see one of my 'fash friends' who I secretly hate and who always make me feel like I'm not SPARKY ENOUGH. Or whatever. I read it, like twice, and it's obviously really funny. We've all seen DOs and DON'Ts before, it's how you pass the time when you have a hangover and you were mean to your friends and you need to see other people being mean to distract you from thinking about it. Also we all secretly want to make sure we're not up there with the glitter bears and Ukranian prostitute hipsters. I'm pretty certain that when I wear dresses I'm a DON'T and when I wear pyjama shorts and stripy socks I'm a DO. This is however highly unlikely. Either way I implore you to read this manual on how to survive in a world of mean snarky journalists, otherwise you'll be subject to utter humiliation and live a life of cold despair and regret. Or just not care. They're also throwing some launch parties where you can win one of these STYLE BIBLES for yourself so you don't even have to buy it. Plus there will probably be some hot guys there. And me.

Fashion Night In

 

Ok so I only went to one party but whatever, Bodeans is worth several #FNO's. Several. I wore a Topshop Boutique dress over an American Apparel sleeveless shirt thing and my spiky DMs from Sick and I only got minimal BBQ sauce on myself! So there. Xx

CRUELLA LE BERT

Today I'm wearing my NEW dalmation print hat from River Island which I really wish I didn't love as much as I do because I have a feeling it's going to lose me some friends. And some street cred. And a lot of self respect. Cos jumper, Zara trousers, YMC shoes and CAT BAG! Anyone doing anything fun for Fashion Night Out? I think I might spend it in my front room with BUFFY xx

 

FLIP IT

So much delicious stuff in the MCQ flip book. I don't know why they're wearing those horrid gloves though they look like they came straight outta an old Gaga video. TBH they probably did. But oh I'm getting carried away, look at all that tartan. KRUSHING HARD.

McQ Flipbook: Women's Autumn/Winter 2011 Collection from Alexander McQueen on Vimeo.

BACK FROM BEYOND

Ok sorry guys my blog seems to have declined into one of those stupid blogspots where you just post pictures of yourself doing different boring stuff. SORRY. I just haven't really got any cool pictures of any cool stuff at the moment. But anyway if you get bored of my face please let me know (maybe in nicer terms). So this weekend I went to my mum's house in France and managed to find these white thick soled canvas plimsolls for 4 euros in a Brocante in the middle of nowhere. Um. Lucky? They're a bit gross and gooey inside but for less than a fiver I'm pretty sure my socks can take it. Unfortunately I'm really not used to wearing trainers and especially white ones, any ideas what I should wear them with?! HELP!? Also isn't my brother such a stud? WHAT A BABE.